Restoration a matter of Mutual Respect

God has been actively involved in the restoration of both male and female identity and purpose since the fall; beginning with the first animal He sacrificed in order to cover Adam and Eve’s nakedness. The process continued with the shedding of Jesus Blood as an atonement for the sins of this world. However, the most intense period of restoration has been reserved for the end time, prior to the final confrontation with satin himself.

Ignorance of the fact that God has been working since the fall to restore men and women to their proper place as guardians of this world, has been of tremendous advantage to the devil. By assuming as believers, that women ( single or married, young or old) do not have a role to play in the end time battle that is raging all around us, has kept the Body of Christ from becoming a force to reckon with. Since it will take the entire Body of Christ to crush satin’s head, and half the Body are women, it becomes vital for women to break free from the religious bondage that has kept them from rising to their full potential.

Mutual Respect plays a vital role in the restoration processes between men and women. Lack of mutual respect, can and does caused division between a married couple, or with in the body of Christ.

The signs of disrespect do not have to start with a slap or be physical at all. It can be as subtle as being rude, name calling, making treats, belittling, accusing, demanding, and intimidation are all forms of disrespects. With in the church it can be as subtle as twisting scripture in order to give one gender power over another, or through false accusations that have no bases of truth and are uncalled for.

Disrespect is not unique to one gender. It does not matter whether you are male or female. If you are a person that is constantly belittles or questioning what the another person says and does, or tries in any way to use fear of reprisal ( threatening God wrath or your own ) as a way of manipulating another persons beliefs or behavior , then you do not have a clear understanding of what respect really is.

Respect means recognizing the worth of others and ourselves. When we respect our partner, we are able to rise above pettiness, jealousy and cruelty. When we respect ourselves, we are able to transcend insecurity, defensiveness and fear. Respecting both ourselves and our partners , or any other person in our lives enables us to build strong, lasting and mutually-supportive relationships. This process begins with a woman understanding that she has it with in her to bring about changes in her relationship with others and with in her marriage relationships, and not through any form of manipulation.

Beginning with marriage, Peter spoke on the subject of a man’s disrespect for his wife; “You husbands likewise, live with your wives in and understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a women; grand her honors as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered”.( I Peter 3:7)

Please notice the reference to women being coheirs of the grace of life. Men have no problem sharing the grace of God with women, but the grace of life Peter is talking about means something else altogether. It means that on this planet man and women are co-tenants, co-stewards, and heirs. The bottom line is that women have the same rights in God eye as men do. And as children of God, the same ministry gifts and responsibilities.

The warning that Peter gave to men was simple, if they did not show their wives respect, than they should expect that their prayers will be hindered. In other words, God will not listen to men until they learn to listen to their wives. On the other hand a wife that does not respect her husband, does not listen to him, faces the same consequence of having her prayers hindered. It does not matter whether she agrees with him or not, it is a matter of respect.

It is true that many women today, find themselves married to men that seem to be deaf. I would love to say that I have found it easy to respect my husband, especially when he is being disrespectful towards me. I want to be obedient to God’s command, but I don’t want to be dishonest to my feelings. God doesn’t command a wife to “feel” respectful toward her husband. She is to be respectful! There is a clear difference. Her responsibility is to obey God; not her feelings.

A wise woman once told me, “If you want a truly fine husband, respect him at the level at which you want him to reach. A man will usually not rise above the level at which his wife respects him.” This is a general principle, not a hard and fast rule because God does not put accountability or responsibility for a man’s character on his wife. Nevertheless, strong evidence indicates a woman holds great power to make or break a man.

What a man craves and need the most in his life, especially from his wife is respect. This is why God instructed women to honor their husbands. “Wives, in the same way honor your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.” ( 1 Peter 3:1-2) When a wife honors a husband who is disobedient to the Word that husband will be changed. Why?

God tells women to honor their husbands , because when they do, their husband will do anything for them even if they are being disobedient to the Word. To be honored by their wives is their highest desire. The reason behind this need for a woman’s respect goes back to the womb, where he spent nine months. From the womb he lies with in a woman’s arm to be feed and nurtured. As he grows, she guides him and instructs him, and in doing so she becomes the person that gives him encouragement and affirmation needed for him to grow into a strong man. This is clearly seen in the unique relationship that a son and his mother have, a bond far closure than a fathers.

When a man gets married the core need for woman’s approval is already in place. That is why God has told women that they have the ability with in them, to change their husband. Honor is what makes a man tick. The same way that no one can live without oxygen , no man can live without honor. He thrives and grows in wisdom in the Lord when his need is fulfilled. This explains why God emphatically says, “The wife must see to it that she respects her husband” (Ephesians 5:33).

A women respect her husband by first realize that she cannot change her husband, only her own reaction to him. When we try changing another person through arguing or persuasion translates to them as the complete denial and devaluation of their own experiences and realities. They will feel an immediate instinct to protect the intricacies of their own thought patterns and push your logic away in the process. Remember that we cannot argue logically with an unreasonable person. The only thing that can change a person’s thought patterns is introduction them to a new way of dealing with issues in their lives by being a positive example.

There are very few Christian women that have the wisdom or the patients to allow God to convict their mates and bring about the natural change the comes with spiritual maturity. Instead, we open our mouth an try and force our men to change. When what we need to do is look with in our own heart and change how we personally deal with the men in our lives.

If you are a single woman, the need to respect any man that crosses your path is still important. You do not show yourself as a woman of self-respect, if you take on the thought patterns or beliefs that you can do anything a man can, ( even if your are able to do the same job) and then make sure that everyone knows it. Why? Because then your disrespect is know an action of pride. “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” Proverbs 16:18

In conclusion ,

Although as Women Warriors we have been forced to lie low, hardly noticed as a valuable part of the Body. Although as Women Warriors we have been pushed aside, by the concept of “male” authority. Like doves that sit upon the fence of a dirt sheepfold. At an appointed time. God’s humble women will rise up and begin to fight. And when we give chase the enemy will flee. Until then the doves most help to God in His restoration process of Men and Women.

The time will come when males and females will begin to look at each other as God does, and then we begin to value the differences between the genders. United as partners within the family unit, leads to great healing and victory over the powers of darkness, that are working hard to divide and concur us. United as a Body brings victory and peace, but only if we are willing to look more closely at the teaching with in the church world that encourages division with in the genders.

1 Peter 2:9 it says, "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness in to his wonderful light". We are called male and female to be the light in the darkness, beginning with our own home and our own personal relationships with others....